It is a touchy topic around our house, one that my husband knows about but not one we are going to be talking about much in the near future.
Ever since we started down the road of DI and I started to learn more about it I knew that I had to tell my child/children about their conception and provide them with as much information as I could. In doing so I put my information up on the donor sibling registry and found that my girl had a half sister that was only a few months older. I have been in touch via email with one of her moms and we have exchanged general information about the girls. We have both said that the reason we are in touch with eachother is so that down the road our girls can make their own decision if they want to meet eachother.
Keeping in contact with the other parents is just on of the small things I can do to help my baby in the future. There isn’t much I can do other then that to provide her with information about who she is other then what she knows of her life here with us. I am also planning on having one more baby and we do have the same donors gametes on ice so hopefully all will work and she will have a sibling in our immediate family that is a full genetic sibling.
I find myself looking at her everyday and hoping that I/we have not made a decision that will forever plague her with doubt about who she is. I contemplate my options on raising her, how will I make sure she has enough self-esteem that she is comfortable with who she is as our daughter and as a women. I am not sure I am going to be much of an example as I struggle everyday with my own selfworth and my choices, but that is an issue for a completely different blog.
I appreciate the other blogs, posts and online articles I read both from parents of DI children and from DI children themselves. At times I can get myself into a bit of a panic when I read the posts of the children who are feeling extremely bitter and lost because they do not know half of their biology, however, I try not to let it influence me to much. We have a long way to go before we even start to explain any of this to her and I hope in the time from now until then I will have learned from others aswell as created friendships for her with other DI kids so she can feel a sense of belonging.
I have to keep in mind my husbands words, she is just a little baby and we need to let her be just that. At this point she is doing a great job at being a Baby, and I have to be careful not to let all this DI stuff overwhelm me. It is what it is and will never be anything different, and there is nothing wrong with learning all I can about it to make her life easier, but it doesn’t have to be my life’s focus.